Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
5 Ways to Become Unbored at Work
I'm fortunate. I do not take things for granted. Having said that, I'm going to take the fact that I have a great job for granted. There are many points during my day in which boredom over comes me. Ask anybody (don't ask anybody), and they will tell you that coping with boredom is a very important part of a productive work day.
It's been researched by (insert reputable research team here) and they have proven that people who take regular breaks from work by going on facebook or twitter throughout the day get more work done. It's true. Look it up.
Following this logic, I am the most productive employee at The Tonight Show with my vaultmate in a close second. Therefore, I've decided to give you all a list of five things to do at work so you can be as productive as I.
FIVE WAYS TO BECOME UNBORED AT WORK
5. Pandora - www.pandora.com
For those of you who do not know, pandora is an internet radio station that generates playlists based on a song or artist of your choice. It's fantastic. You type in an amazing song (i.e. Billy Joel's Scene's from an Italian Restaurant) and BAM! A playlist featuring other songs from artists like Billy Joel (including a hefty dose of more Billy Joel). To put this in terms that Billy Joel would understand: It's like ordering a Rum and Coke from a bartender and having him follow that up with a 7&7 followed by a Long Island Iced Tea and so on, until you're red in the nose and bald. In either instance by the time you're done with this service, you'll find yourself wondering where the time has gone and if you can hold onto your pride and your adult diapers at the same time.
4. College Humor - www.collegehumor.com
I know I'm not in college any more, but this site still holds a warm place in my heart. Instead of looking at it's pictures with a wide eyed sense of "will I ever get to that place," I now look at down my nose wondering if children will ever learn. And yes, they will learn. They will learn that one day they will grow up and learn how to use household tools. And that duct tape is not a suitable way to attach a funnel to a hose (a steel clamp works much better).
Either way, this collection of well produced (usually) hilarious videos and sophomoric (brilliant) pictures will have you giggling throughout your work day. And also there are pictures of boobs. I don't care who you are. gay or straight, everyone appreciates a nice pair of eye magnets.
3. USA today crossword - Google: USA today Crossword (I can't do all the work for you)
Now I know what you're saying: "Ross, I'm not much of an intellectual, ho
w will this occupy my time?" Well, clearly you're not an intellectual, otherwise you would know how this could keep you busy. But I am here to clear this up for you (you're welcome). Not only is a crossword a great way to keep sharp in your old age (anything over 25) but it makes people passing by your computer think you are smart. I don't care if you are googling every answer in there or even fitting different dirty words into the number of spaces you have available, anyone who passes by someone doing a crossword thinks "Man, that person is smarter than me. I should give them money." So if you want your coworkers to give you money. Do the crossword. Three down is Banana.
2. Clicker - www.clicker.com
This is actually something that some of you might find useful if you don't know about it already. Clicker is an awesome website that will guide you to anywhere on the Ultranet to find full episodes streaming of your favorite TV shows. 100% legal, 100% awesome. As someone who works in television and claims that watching television is part of his job description (if I'm slouched down in my chair watching How I Met Your Mother I'm on the clock and shouldn't be bothered) this site has been a great resource. Not only does it point you to network shows, but also popular web series that old people (again, anyone over 25) might not be cool enough to know about. Jump around on that for an hour or so. Pretend you're a Mormon and it's a trampoline (Fun Fact: Mormons love trampolines).
2b. "ThatLooks Like" YouTube Channel - http://www.youtube.com/user/thatlookslike
This won't occupy you long enough to make it its own number on the list, however it is worth a minute or two of your time. This is something I use for actual work whenever we get a celebrity guest on the show and I might want to throw in some of their earliest work. This channel has a bunch of celebrities' earliest appearances on television and in movies. Each of them more embarrassing than the next. My favorite so far: Jack Black as an over eager son of a religious woman. If you've ever wondered what a prep school student on Cocaine looked like, you should definitely check it out.
1. Island Paradise - www.facebook.com/islandparadise
This game kills me. I didn't want to get into it. In fact, I only did it as a favor to a friend so he could get more points and get a bigger island, but it's turned into a very relaxing way to relax on a deserted island by myself, all without leaving the office. Some things that bug me about the game are the plot holes. you start out on an island with half of a row boat and a tree on your beach, yet somehow, you're able to use gold to buy seeds for plants as well as trees and animals. Where the hell did the seeds come from? And also, if you were stranded on an island with half a rowboat, wouldn't you immediately use the tree to repair the wood in the rowboat and find civilization? Either way, it's fucking addicting. You know what? Forget I said anything, just stick with 5-2b.
It's been researched by (insert reputable research team here) and they have proven that people who take regular breaks from work by going on facebook or twitter throughout the day get more work done. It's true. Look it up.
Following this logic, I am the most productive employee at The Tonight Show with my vaultmate in a close second. Therefore, I've decided to give you all a list of five things to do at work so you can be as productive as I.
FIVE WAYS TO BECOME UNBORED AT WORK
5. Pandora - www.pandora.com
For those of you who do not know, pandora is an internet radio station that generates playlists based on a song or artist of your choice. It's fantastic. You type in an amazing song (i.e. Billy Joel's Scene's from an Italian Restaurant) and BAM! A playlist featuring other songs from artists like Billy Joel (including a hefty dose of more Billy Joel). To put this in terms that Billy Joel would understand: It's like ordering a Rum and Coke from a bartender and having him follow that up with a 7&7 followed by a Long Island Iced Tea and so on, until you're red in the nose and bald. In either instance by the time you're done with this service, you'll find yourself wondering where the time has gone and if you can hold onto your pride and your adult diapers at the same time.
4. College Humor - www.collegehumor.com
I know I'm not in college any more, but this site still holds a warm place in my heart. Instead of looking at it's pictures with a wide eyed sense of "will I ever get to that place," I now look at down my nose wondering if children will ever learn. And yes, they will learn. They will learn that one day they will grow up and learn how to use household tools. And that duct tape is not a suitable way to attach a funnel to a hose (a steel clamp works much better).
Either way, this collection of well produced (usually) hilarious videos and sophomoric (brilliant) pictures will have you giggling throughout your work day. And also there are pictures of boobs. I don't care who you are. gay or straight, everyone appreciates a nice pair of eye magnets.
3. USA today crossword - Google: USA today Crossword (I can't do all the work for you)
Now I know what you're saying: "Ross, I'm not much of an intellectual, ho
w will this occupy my time?" Well, clearly you're not an intellectual, otherwise you would know how this could keep you busy. But I am here to clear this up for you (you're welcome). Not only is a crossword a great way to keep sharp in your old age (anything over 25) but it makes people passing by your computer think you are smart. I don't care if you are googling every answer in there or even fitting different dirty words into the number of spaces you have available, anyone who passes by someone doing a crossword thinks "Man, that person is smarter than me. I should give them money." So if you want your coworkers to give you money. Do the crossword. Three down is Banana.2. Clicker - www.clicker.com
This is actually something that some of you might find useful if you don't know about it already. Clicker is an awesome website that will guide you to anywhere on the Ultranet to find full episodes streaming of your favorite TV shows. 100% legal, 100% awesome. As someone who works in television and claims that watching television is part of his job description (if I'm slouched down in my chair watching How I Met Your Mother I'm on the clock and shouldn't be bothered) this site has been a great resource. Not only does it point you to network shows, but also popular web series that old people (again, anyone over 25) might not be cool enough to know about. Jump around on that for an hour or so. Pretend you're a Mormon and it's a trampoline (Fun Fact: Mormons love trampolines).
2b. "ThatLooks Like" YouTube Channel - http://www.youtube.com/user/thatlookslike
This won't occupy you long enough to make it its own number on the list, however it is worth a minute or two of your time. This is something I use for actual work whenever we get a celebrity guest on the show and I might want to throw in some of their earliest work. This channel has a bunch of celebrities' earliest appearances on television and in movies. Each of them more embarrassing than the next. My favorite so far: Jack Black as an over eager son of a religious woman. If you've ever wondered what a prep school student on Cocaine looked like, you should definitely check it out.
1. Island Paradise - www.facebook.com/islandparadise
This game kills me. I didn't want to get into it. In fact, I only did it as a favor to a friend so he could get more points and get a bigger island, but it's turned into a very relaxing way to relax on a deserted island by myself, all without leaving the office. Some things that bug me about the game are the plot holes. you start out on an island with half of a row boat and a tree on your beach, yet somehow, you're able to use gold to buy seeds for plants as well as trees and animals. Where the hell did the seeds come from? And also, if you were stranded on an island with half a rowboat, wouldn't you immediately use the tree to repair the wood in the rowboat and find civilization? Either way, it's fucking addicting. You know what? Forget I said anything, just stick with 5-2b.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Secret Santa
All the rumors about being in an office are true. Copiers are always overcrowded, people do talk about television around the water cooler, and Secret Santa is the greatest thing ever.
As the new guy I was a little hesitant at first but I decided to throw my name into the hat. This morning when I arrived, I found this:
I thought. Oh, wow, they knew I was Jewish. Then I looked inside and found these:
Someone clearly knows that I'm a closeted Catholic.
I'm really looking forward to finding out what other perks working in an office has to offer. Big fingers crossed for the Chinese New Year. I hear that holiday is ridiculous.
As the new guy I was a little hesitant at first but I decided to throw my name into the hat. This morning when I arrived, I found this:
I thought. Oh, wow, they knew I was Jewish. Then I looked inside and found these:
Someone clearly knows that I'm a closeted Catholic.I'm really looking forward to finding out what other perks working in an office has to offer. Big fingers crossed for the Chinese New Year. I hear that holiday is ridiculous.
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